I am one of them

I need to make a confession. And today is the day I have got to do it. I need to come out of the closet and reveal to the world who I truly am.

No more whisperings. No more lame excuses for suspicious behavior. I can’t bear it any more. I know it will hurt my family, some of my friends or even my career prospects.

I am one of them.

How or when I became so I don’t remember. I have been that way as long as I can remember. Maybe it ran in some of my family. Maybe my friends when I was small. But I am not afraid any longer. Today I have come out to proclaim to the world – you can humiliate me, isolate me or curse me for being one of them.

But I shall remain firm. My loyalty shall not change. And I shall believe till the end – “FOOTBALL IS THE GREATEST GAME IN THE WORLD”

Yes. I am one of those raging football lunatics. One of those who leave everything behind to watch the World Cup. Family, job – even parties.

Ballack is the tragic hero of this world cup. Oliver Kahn shall always remain an idol. Never liked Ronaldo much. Maradona personifies me. Baggio broke my heart. Wept for Escobar. Secretly admired Zidane and Beckham. Believes Rooney is a goon. Messi is a magician. My team is Germany. And I support the football hooligans. As someone famously remarked – “It is the closest thing we have to war”.

Yes… I am one of them.

From today don’t talk to me if it isn’t about football. Don’t invite me to parties where there is no big screen. Don’t expect me to write anything else other than about football.

So this time for Africa- WAKA WAKA !!

Dead Guy Talking

I stared out into the drizzling rain… and I heard the fluttering wings of a butterfly by my ear. Oh… wait! That’s not a butterfly. Its something else… like a huge housefly…. huge and ugly. Ugh!

Anyway…

I was about to die. I knew it.

I sat motionless in the chair with my arms resting awkwardly on both sides and my chin drooping to my right shoulder. I avoided all movements as I knew it would lead to another fit of deadly coughing. The only movement I make is that of my eye balls. I try to act like Stephen Hawking as much as I can. I know I have the brain; I just need the looks.

People think its silly you will die of a common cold. Not me. I have always known I would die of something dreadful like a cold, coughing or sneezing - sneeze, sneeze, SNEEZE! That’s it. I drop dead. How terrible. Yet all these stupid people out there keep telling you to shake off such ‘fancy’ notions. What do they know? Here it’s lonely at the end.

I always get philosophical when I am about to die. Clouds of memories floating before my eyes in the rain and …

Suddenly a steaming hot cup is thrust into my direct view.

“Here… have some chukku kappi (medicinal coffee)”
“I don’t want it”
“It’s good for that sore throat”
“I said I don’t want it…anyway I think it’s too late for these now”
“Oh shut up! All you have is a silly cold”
“It might be just a silly cold to you. But to me it is a…uhh…it is the most important cold of my life!”
“I’m leaving it here. Drink if you want to.”

What does she know about dying? Medicines cannot help once your life energy has started ebbing away. But anyway I drink it because it is not right to hurt our beloved ones just before we pass into another world. Well, and also, because it tastes good.

I sit back and rub some more Vicks on my neck. Feels like someone tried to strangle me yesterday night. The only good smell there is about a cold is that of Vicks – brings back memories. Like the time you wanted to…

At that moment my mobile rings loudly jarring my memories. I cut it off. It rings again. This really is making me angry. Will no one let a man die in peace? I pick it up.

(Grumpily) “Who is this?”
“Hey…it’s Vishnu”
“What do you want?”
“Aren’t you coming to Mahesh’s party?”
“NO!”
“Aww…C’mon. Everyone is waiting”
“I’m not interested”
“All of our friends will be there”
“I don’t care”
“Mahesh had specifically requested you to be there”
“Tell him to go to hell”
“There will be free beer"
“I’LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES!! Don’t start without me!”

What the hell. I guess I’ll have to live to see yet another day. Till then the dead guy’s musings will just have to wait for the next rainy day.

Cheers!

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Its Better to Leave Aliens Alone says Stephen Hawking

Alien life is almost certain to exist in many other parts of the universe according to the world’s most famous living scientist Stephen Hawking but he warns that contact with them might end up in disastrous results for mankind. Therefore humanity should be doing all it to avoid any contact with other intelligent life forms they don't fully understand.

Earth is unlikely to be the only place where life is present in a universe that has 100 billion galaxies containing millions of stars. According to Hawking most of the extra terrestrial life will be made up of microbes or simple animals. However some of these life forms could be intelligent and pose a threat. “Such advanced aliens would perhaps become nomads, looking to conquer and colonize whatever planets they can reach.”

He compares that outcome scenario with the landing of Christopher Columbus in America “which didn’t turn out very well for the Native Americans.”

Other experts too have warned that aliens might prove to be beyond human understanding.

“The real challenge is to work out what aliens might actually be like” says Stephen Hawking

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Same Sex Marriages on Top of the World… Literally

After India, it is now Nepal’s turn to openly embrace same sex couples. The Nepal Tourism Department is planning to promote gay weddings by holding same sex marriages at - where else but - Mount Everest!

The campaign was kicked off by the Nepal Tourism Minister sending a message to the International Conference on Gay & Lesbian Tourism in Boston - “As the world knows, Nepal is the land of Mount Everest, world’s highest peak and the birth place of Lord Buddha, light of Asia,” the message said. “I, therefore, would like to take this opportunity to invite and welcome all the sexual and gender minorities from around the world.” Nepal is also due to host the first Asian Symposium on Gay & Lesbian Tourism in Kathmandu in June.

One of the pioneers for this sudden change in Nepal’s policies is Sunil Babu Pant, Nepal’s leading gay rights activist and the only openly homosexual MP in South Asia. While some officials fear a backlash in more conservative rural areas, Mr. Pant says that most Nepalis are instinctively tolerant “as long you don’t walk naked or do something explicit”.

South Asia seems to be certainly expanding its horizons in unprecedented directions.

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Stained with Blood - The Red Corridor

Maoists brutally kill 75 soldiers in Chhattisgarh. Kanu Sanyal commits suicide.

The naxal menace has once again emerged as the most pressing issue in national media and politics. No one, myself included, in their right senses can support the Naxals for launching a war against their own country. But a lethal offensive by armed forces, either of the state or the Center, alone may not be sufficient to solve this crisis.

40 years after Naxalbari, adivasis and other down-trodden masses are still taking up arms. Why? The Home Minister claims the Maoists are terrorizing the villagers to take up arms. That may be true when applied to a small percent. But thousands and thousands of people? Spread over 16 states?

Politics and development are the twin centers of this deadly movement. Only after that would come the threat of weapons and ideology to force or lure people into armed revolution. The establishment succeeded in killing Charu Majumdar and Kanu Sanyal. And what happened? Kishanji and Khobad Ghandy came up. If they are killed, others will take their place.

At present a massive re-distribution of wealth from the poor to the rich is taking place in the country. The rich are getting richer and the poor are getting poorer. Unless the economic issues are resolved and development reaches the lowest strata of society and the poorest of the tribals and adivasis are empowered politically the Maoist menace won’t end. Ministers and bureaucrats sitting in AC offices in metros please sit up and take note. In the not distant future Maoist guerrillas will come out of the forests and engage in urban warfare. And then the cost this country will pay for ignoring the oppressed voices – might just be too much to recover from.

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Agasthyarkoodam Trip - Part VIII - Concluding

We decide to complete the return journey the same day itself as most members of our group are working and would like a full day rest. So in spite of the warning of others that by the time we reach Bonacaud it might get dark we start from Athirupara at 2 PM. We also hoped to see some animals since we are told that most animals who prefer to lie in the shade during noon when it is hottest come out around sunset for one last forage for food. Though we are tired we are happy we made it to the top and the thought of the warmth of our homes help us to proceed in good speed.

At a place near a stream called Attapara we find a team on their way up waiting with their guide who inform us that right near by where we came down an elephant had been spotted and trekkers were advised to wait till the danger cleared. Of course since we were without a guide we were unaware of this and while some of us were disappointed that we didn’t spot the elephant, others were relieved that the elephant didn’t spot us!

We finally made it back to Bonacaud right as the sun was setting. It goes without saying the forest officers too were relieved to see us. Here we stopped to have tea. While we were walking we hadn’t really noticed the pain in our legs as we were busy taking in the mesmerizing sights nature had to offer. However now after having tea we found that we couldn’t even get up from a chair without help. Our legs had become stiff and our muscles were stretched to their extent. But, as everyone who has made this trip will tell you, it’s worth it.

So here’s what I finally have to say – Agasthyarkoodam is one place in Kerala, or the whole world for that matter, you definitely have got to see. The beauty and wonder will linger in your mind long after you have left the place. Let me put it this way – you may leave the place, but the place never leaves you. The trees, the flowers, the rocks, the rivers, the waterfalls, the sky, the clouds, the mist and Agasthyamuni at the peak – shall always be in my mind.

Whaling in Denmark – Dispelling myths of Fwd mails

I have a habit of checking the veracity of the ‘Fwd mails’ I get – you know the e-mails on some remote subject that are forwarded by everyone. About dangerous viruses, on health and the most recent trend – violently shocking pictures of wars, killings and suicides. I usually reply to the friend who sends me the mail sometimes asking them to refrain from forwarding graphic pictures without checking their genuineness. For example when the civil war in Sri Lanka reached its height before the killing of Velupillai Prabhakaran I received lots of mails with pictures of gruesome dead bodies, some reportedly killed by the LTTE and some by the Sri Lankan army. In fact I ended up receiving the same photos of dead bodies twice – one claimed it to be a massacre by the Sri Lankan army and the second claimed it to be a massacre by the LTTE!

Another one I have received recently a couple of times is about the killing of whales in Denmark. The mail shows a sea stained in red with hundreds of dead whales. The whales are supposedly killed by teens as an initiation into manhood. The cruelty must stop – this is the content of the mail.
The pictures looked authentic. What could possibly make men so cruel and why is it still happening in the modern world? So I did my research in the internet and here is what I came up with. I am not going to say if it is a good or bad thing – readers have to draw their own conclusions. Here are some of the facts:

The pictures of the mass killings of whales (the particular species is called pilot whale) are authentic. It takes place in an island called Faroe Islands – a constituent of Denmark. However I can’t find anything to suggest it is a ritual – rather it is a community action, called the grindadráp, to provide food. The whale meat is never sold; instead it is divided evenly to everyone who wants it. Records of whale drive hunts in the Faroe Islands date back to 1584. Most Faroese consider the hunt an important part of their culture and history whereas animal-right activists consider the hunt as being cruel and unnecessary.

According to The Office of Protected Resources, an US government agency responsible for protecting marine mammals and endangered marine life, there is no danger of the pilot whale becoming extinct.

From Wikipedia: “Most part of traditional Faroese food consists of (whale) meat. Because of the harsh Faroese climate, grain and vegetables have not been able to grow very well... During the winter months the Faroe Islanders´ only option was to mostly eat salted or dried food… including pilot whale meat. This means that over the centuries, the pilot whale has been an important source of food and vitamins to the isolated population on the North Atlantic archipelago.” (edited)

So what may seem repulsing in one culture may be quite acceptable or necessary in another. Cultural differences have to be taken into account while passing judgment on issues. Such mails and pictures could offend people and cultures we don’t know about and we have no right to criticize as much as they don’t have a right to criticize ours. Though I agree with the good intentions behind most of these mails I urge my friends to be a little more cautious and understanding while forwarding such “Fwd mails”. If not, you could end up producing the opposite of the desired effect.

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