My Dream for Posterity - On Exams

(23-02-2009)


I hate examinations.

Exams always remind me of the fact that I’m not intelligent. Anyway not intelligent enough. I only have sporadic outbursts of intelligence… which are too insignificant to be counted on any scale. And that doesn’t help in exams.

Why do we even need exams?

I have a dream. [This speech is to be recorded and played on every Republic Day or Independence Day]

I have a dream that one day this nation will rise up and live out its true meaning without conducting any examinations.

I have a dream that one day on the green hills of Ponmudi the sons of former slaves and the sons of former slave owners will be able to sit down together at the table of brotherhood without being asked how much marks they scored in the exams.

I have a dream that one day the state of Kerala, a state sweltering with the heat of the sun, will be transformed into an oasis of freedom and justice, where no exams are held.

I have a dream that little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the number of exams they have passed but by the content of their character.

I have a dream today.

I have a dream that one day, down in Palayam, little brown boys and brown girls will be able to join hands with little white boys and white girls as sisters and brothers without having to write any exams.

And when this happens, when we allow freedom to ring, when we let it ring from every village and every hamlet, from every state and every city, we will be able to speed up that day when everyone, black men and white men, Jews and Gentiles, Protestants and Catholics, Hindus and Muslims will be able to join hands and sing, "Free at last! Free at last! No more exams! Thank God Almighty, no more exams! We are free at last!"

[Incidentally son of Martin Luther King, who gave the original “I have a dream” speech, is coming to Kerala today, the 23rd]

Present Continuous

(18-02-2009)

Following is a conversation that took place between a student in our class [“C”] and our English teacher teaching tenses.

Teacher: Another e.g. for present continuous - C - are you reading a novel now?

C: Yes I am reading a novel now.

Teacher: Now? No you are not reading a novel now. You are sitting in the class now.

C: Oh! But I am reading a novel at home. So can I say I am reading a novel now?

Teacher: You cannot say you are reading a novel now but you can say you are reading a novel.

C: So I can say I’m reading a novel when I’m actually not reading a novel.

Teacher: But you are reading a novel?

C: No I’m sitting in the class now.

Teacher: No, I mean, not now, but you are reading a novel?

C: Yes I am reading a novel.

Teacher: So you can say that.

C: Say what?

Teacher: That you are reading a novel.

C: Now?

Teacher: No, not now.

C: You mean, I should not say ‘now’.

Teacher: Say what now?

C: Not say I’m reading a novel now.

Teacher: But you said you are reading a novel.

C: No…err…Yes.

Teacher: So now it’s ok?

C: ‘Now’ is ok?

Teacher: No! ‘Now’ is not ok.

C: Oh! Ok

Teacher: Let‘s go on to the next topic - the Simple Present. Any more doubts.

Hand goes up

Teacher: Yes?

C: So I can say I am reading a novel … even though I am not reading a novel … which means…

[By this time the rest of the class had entirely lost it and I happily fell asleep so I had no idea how it ended.]

Disaster at Pooja

(04-02-2009)

This is a tragic story of unfathomable depths. Everyone please make sure you have a handkerchief to wipe your tears before you read on.

This is the story of how we lost a game of cricket and how the disaster changed our lives forever.

The year 2008. A bunch of guys working together at Cochin.

We registered for a cricket tournament being held at the famous Pooja Ground. 7-over matches.

None of us were professional cricketers but loved to play. So we got together a team of 11, 2 substitute players, a coach and a team manager (myself). We went and watched the other teams play and thought to ourself “This is going to be easy. We can win”. Like our captain said these guys were just striking the ball wildly and did not have the technical expertise.

We practised daily at our nearby school ground. Finally the big day arrived. Before that we had to decide on a name. Most of the other teams had silly, ordinary names like NCC or MCC[place name+Cricket Club]. We needed something grand and finally struck upon “SBL - THE BLACK AND WHITE STALLIONS”. In fact the commentator had to hand over the mike to one of us every time he had to announce the team name.

We lost the toss and had no idea it was just a sign of what was to come. They chose batting and we laughed at their foolishness. The first over was bowled by Sumodh, whose action often reminded us of a fighter plane firing missiles at the enemy. That day he chose to bowl after only a short run up. First mistake. It was only after the game did we realise that what made us afraid of his bowling was his run up and the expression on his face and that the ball itself was harmless.

The first ball went for a six. We shouted “Never mind”.

The second ball went for a six. We shouted “Never mind”.

The third ball went for a six. We knew we were in trouble.

When the guy who hit seven consecutive sixes became out, to a catch (which turned out to be the only catch we would take), we went wild with cheers.

The next guy who walked in hit 13 sixes - consecutively. Was some sort of a record at the ground, again which would only be the beginning of a lot of records.

We could only watch in anguish as balls disappeared into all corners of the stadium, some of them out of the stadium as even the organisers couldn’t keep up with the scoring. Finally when the massacre was over they had scored over 150 runs in 7 overs.

When our team walked out of the ground with drooping shoulders our coach had a brilliant idea and shouted “Great! So its a batting pitch. All the better for us”. Immediately the smiles returned and everyone’s confidence was restored.

The second innings began. Our star batsman Rocky was at the crease. We screamed for blood; “give them a taste of their own medicine” we shouted.
First ball. The cheers reached a crescendo. Rocky mightily swings his magic bat and…
He’s out.
Silence. Disbelief.
To make a long story short we didn’t hit a single six. We didn’t hit a single four. Hell We didn’t even get to hit the ball at all, I think. No we didn’t get all out. Only nine wickets fell. Pradeep top scored with 7 not out. We scored 23/9 in seven overs. Lost the game for 130 runs - the biggest margin in the tournament - the final record to break that day.

To say we ‘lost’ would be an understatement. We were a failure in batting, bowling and fielding - an utter disaster. The crowd made fun of us only at the beginning. Towards the end of the game even the rival team looked at us with pity and sympathy - which was even more unbearable.

While sleeping that night at around 2 am suddenly someone woke me up. I switched on the light and looked into the face of the captain.

“I will never play cricket again in my whole life” he said.

I sighed.
“Me too”

Day of Reckoning...WE NEED A WAR

(09-01-2009)

Even while power hungry politicians are screaming for strong action against Pakistan in the wake of the Mumbai attacks, social workers and the media have been cautioning against escalating the tension that could lead to war. But the fact is…we need a war!! No this is not anti-Pakistan or anti-Islam sentiment speaking, but my crystal-clear, rational mind. For heavens sake we need a war. Look around you, the corrupt politicians, the lazy bureaucrats – I tell you we need a war. If not against Pakistan, then we could fight America or bomb China or maybe even Scotland (I hear they are fierce warriors). We need a violent shake up. The strongest empires are those that were built on violence and washed with centuries of blood.

“Those who make peaceful changes impossible make bloody revolutions imperative”

Israel is bombing Palestine; in Sri Lanka the lions are fighting the tigers. What is the use of standing mutely? I mean the terrorists, from Pakistan, keep hitting us at regular intervals and all we do is express anguish, pain, protest, renounce, threaten, etc, etc. and then we get hit again. It’s not going to stop. So will a war bring peace? Maybe not. But then what difference will it make. Let everyone take up arms – let’s fight, lets spill some blood and guts. Maybe we will win and maybe we will lose. Its not about winning or losing. Its about living, and dying, with honour.

Remember “Permanent peace is never possible.”

New Year Resolutions

(07-01-2009)

Finally...my new year resolutions.

[Statutory Warning: i am just following a tradition and have absolutely no intention of following any of them.] So here goes:

1. Stop sleeping in office: Now that's easy. Pull out the air condition plug. no AC - hard to sleep. Last year my boss fell asleep trying to wake me up. It affects work - I mean his work.

2. Save money: Last week I opened my 6th bank account - and quickly withdrew all the money so it shows the same balance as the other five - zero.By the end of this year i'm going to have 6-digit figures in all of them.(This one has been on my list for the past 6 years)

3. Wear clean clothes: Since i'm a very, very handsome guy (naturally) a lot of people have commented on my dislike of personal hygiene. This year i'll wear only washed, ironed clothes - only branded ones (no more 3 shirts for Rs. 50).

4. Say "sorry": Learn to apologise. I mean, at present also I use the word but then i trip him down the stairs and then say sorry again. its more fun that way. (also take down their photos from the dart board).

5. Stop partying: that's the hardest one. i'm not going to any more rave, booze, beer, etc parties. I find that whenever i have a beer my bike also goes and gets drunk and it keeps falling down all the way home. I think if i quit maybe my bike will also quit.

There are plenty more to add but i guess thinking about these should keep me busy till December!!

The Third Eye

(11-12-2008)

The symbol of the All-Seeing-Eye has always been part of Earth's creational mythologies and mysteries. As all of reality is a metaphor - there are many connected to the symbol of the eye.The third eye can see beyond the physical as it looks out through the chakrasystem when we meditate or look for answers from higher frequencies.

The 'third eye' can be activated to perceive higher dimensions.

'Third eye' development, imagination, and visualization are important ingredients in many methods to separate from the physical form. Intuition is also achieved through 'third eye' development. Knowledge and memory of the astral plane are not registered in full waking consciousness until the intuition becomes strong enough. Flashes of intuition come with increasing consistency as the 'third eye' as activated to a greater degree, through practice.

As the brain enters deeper states, our consciousness is less concerned with the physical state and our 'third eye' is active.

The pineal gland is occasionally associated with the sixth chakra (also called Ajna or the third eye chakra in yoga). It is believed by some to be a dormant organ that can be awakened to enable "telepathic" communication.

Welcome to the World of Blogs

(09-12-2008)

Since the beginning of this century Blogs have been very popular throughout the planet. Blogging has turned out to be the easiest way to express and publish yourself. Here are some terms that are related to blogs:

* vlog - A blog comprising videos

* sketchblog - a site containing a portfolio of sketches

* photoblog - one comprising photos

* tumblelogs - Blogs with shorter posts and mixed media types

* Blogosphere - The collective community of all blogs

* blogroll - increasing popularity through affiliation

* Blogware - software specifically designed for creating and maintaining weblogs

* Moblog - combination of "mobile" and "blog". A blog featuring posts sent mainly by mobile phone, using SMS or MMS messages

* edublog - a blog written by someone with a stake in education

(these are only a few of the hundreds of blog-related terms - anyone is free to contribute some more)

The term "weblog" was coined by Jorn Barger on 17 December 1997. The short form, "blog," was coined by Peter Merholz, who jokingly broke the word weblog into the phrase we blog in the sidebar of his blog Peterme.com in April or May of 1999.